Desert training

March 16, 2016March 16, 2016 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

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The Holy Spirit led Jesus into the desert Matthew 4:1-11. We can find ourselves thrown into what feels like a desert place. We become hungry for God. Yearning to hear from him and yet can’t seem to find him. We can feel disconnected when we try and engage in worship and our prayer life becomes an act of discipline rather than a flow of communication from desire. In the desert we not sure how we got here or how to be during it. We certainly can’t figure out when it will end.

Psalm 23 refers to “walking through the valley of the shadow of death” and the desert can feel and look likes the shadow of spiritual death. Interesting how Jesus handled the desert. He spoke the word of God when the temptation came from the voice of the devil he came to offer an immediate way out and encourage Jesus to follow him rather than the voice of God the father. But Jesus stood firm and spoke scripture to deal with the temptation. What ever takes us to the desert it could be a situation, pressure or the leading of the Holy Spirit it doesn’t matter. What matters is how we navigate it and what our response will be.

God is always looking for our response and to see how we will act under pressure. We probably always act well on the stage of our life but when we are behind the closed doors and the desert experience is strong how will we respond then?

We learn from the book of Job that our character is tested and formed at the same in the desert. Job lost everything except his own life and yet still he had a faithful response and would not slander God or blame him when his so called friends came to offer him a way out. Both Jesus and Job remained faithful and trusted in God despite what they felt like.

I wonder if we can reframe the desert turning it into a training camp where our motives are purified and character is put to the test as if we were being prepared for greatness. Rather than spending ours complaining to God or to those around us we can use the desert wisely and enter training.

What a night

December 24, 2015December 24, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ 2 Comments

here i am

For unto us a Child is born,
Unto us a Son is given;
And the government will be upon His shoulder.
And His name will be called
Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6

Today is Christmas Eve the day when we can stop and think about the reason for Christmas – the birth of Jesus Christ. Nineteen years ago I walked into a Church on Christmas Eve and gave my life fully to Christ. I invited him to come live with me as I travel through life.

Jesus Christ came into the world as the saviour of the world. He is known as the light of the world and brings everlasting life to those who choose to embrace him. Today I have been able to stop and stand still to look at the amazing gift of God to us. This gift being God himself coming to dwell on the earth in the form of mankind known to us as Jesus Christ.

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As I stood in a Church this afternoon and lit a candle, prayed a prayer to dedicate my life afresh to Jesus I was reminded of being connected to the amazing story of Christmas and the person who invoked it. Christmas is where the sacred world of God meets the human world of us and I am so pleased that am able to know God and He knows me all because of the birth of Christ.

Christmas time is our opportunity to say hello to Christ.

A prayer for Christmas

Heavenly Father

As I stand and look for you this night. Bring love and hope into my heart.

Bring peace and comfort into my soul as I sit and remember your gift of Jesus.

I place my life into your hands and trust your ways and direction each day.

Bring joy and love into every bone in my body, a joy that overcomes all pain and fear.

May that Joy spill out to others.

May your Love flow through me to be a blessing.

Thank you Heavenly Father for Jesus the light of world that lightens up my heart.

Your life counts

December 15, 2015December 16, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

What story are you writing through your life? I am writing this from Uganda, having been out here for two weeks. This was not my first time in fact the story of Uganda and I began in 1997 when I first travelled to an area called Kumi. That trip was the tipping point for me that led to making changes in my life. The impact of that trip will never leave me and causes me to keep investing in the story that is unfolding every time I return.

In the west we are so goal driven to tick things off that we sometime fail to see the bigger picture that is being painted over our life span. In 1998 I went back to Uganda with the intention to live in the country and co ordinate medical services for the poor. However sometimes it is not possible at the time to go ahead with the best laid plans. But a seed had been planted in the hearts of the Ugandan people and I.

I met a man in 2003 called Simon. He helped a team I was leading with translation and logistics – he had a humble heart working as a cleaner at Ngora hospital and lived in a small garage at the time. He told me how he would come to the UK and study one day. I was blown away when he did. He studied and went back with an MA in theology and development. Whilst in the UK he had worked at a takeaway shop and sent the money back home.

Once home he brought some land and built a house in a remote village with the money he earned. Simon is ordained as a priest in the Anglican Church of Uganda and together we train and equip men and women in the ministry. This land now serves the community in that area by providing clean water that we at RSVP Trust helped to construct. Young people who were unemployed are employed to help with the project. They deliver water to elderly people who have no children to help them. They help the sick when food and wood are needed and they cannot manage. I sat down and met the young people on this trip and talked about the importance of having a vision for living whilst you are young.

The land is about venture into poultry farming so more hopeless uneducated young people can gain employment and have a purpose in life. Who would have dreamed that the man I met who lived in a garage and cleaned the hospital would have such an impact in his community through our friendship. His latest project is to restructure and regenerate Ngora hospital. I had the pleasure of spending a day at the hospital distributing gifts of hope and thinking about how we can support local people receive medical care.

As I reflect prior to returning home I am again awe struck realising that what I thought was lost had an even larger vision waiting to be unveiled sixteen years later. I thank God for allowing me to take this journey having learned to trust Him with my life plan. So I wonder what story your life is revealing? I would encourage you to sit back and look at the wider impact that your life is producing.

Transformation

November 16, 2015December 6, 2016 ~ alisonfenning ~ 2 Comments

Every day we have the opportunity to change. Changing our mindsets and attitudes eventually changes the state of our hearts and leads to transformation. Many of us like the idea of change but can’t seem to pull it off. I have worked alongside men and women seeking change for ten years and indeed have had my own battles with wanting transformation of the heart; it is not an easy quest.

This is where embracing Jesus Christ as a person and his way can lead us onto the path of transformation. Jesus walked the path of right living and so he knows how to do it therefore having an active relationship with him can direct us as we seek change.

Transformational change is a process and not a quick fix miracle cure. We often want the quick fix but we would miss the lessons on the way. The disciples who lived with Jesus went through a three year challenged to change process. Daily Jesus challenged them on attitudes and mindsets by modelling a different way to think and live. Working to renew our mind means working to a daily recovery action plan. This helps to set us free from old habits, attitudes and mindsets that are infiltrating our hearts and prayer is the icing on the cake.

By now you maybe asking where do I begin with designing a daily recovery plan. A great place is to become aware of what areas you would like to be changed. This can be done through prayerfully asking Jesus. Over the years I have asked Jesus to pin point areas where I need to soften in my heart to be more like him in my ways. If we notice what we dislike in others then realise we are probably acting the same. Then we have an area that could be transformed.

Daily taking one day at a time begin to practice living from a different platform. The teachings of Jesus and the New Testament form foundation for that platform. So get digging to see how Jesus dealt with life and do that. Ask questions of the Bible looking for the how to do mindset / attitude as you head out on the process.

Lasting transformation of the heart comes through Gods divine ability working on the inside and our engagement with that process in a practical way. Lets hot up our personal prayer life and watch our transformation begin.

Anxious Solutions: Part Two

May 26, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ 1 Comment

rose As I sit and write this I am sat in Rwanda having travelled yesterday. Travel is always very stressful for me, not only the day, but in the lead up to it for at least three days before. I can feel all the mixed emotions kick in. So over the years I have discovered a practical way to manage myself. Travel for me means adventure, which I love. Also separation from the people and places I love. It means extra pressure, as the ministries I oversee in the UK don’t stop just because I am out of town

It is interesting to intentionally notice what brings us to the table of anxiety. Awareness is the key to not allowing anxiety to determine the course of our days. We all have difficult situations or days as we travel through life and it’s about finding small ways to manage ourselves during those days.

In the last article I recommended daily prayer as a means of giving over our anxieties to Jesus who is built to carry such things on our behalf taken from 1 Peter 5:7. There is also a great scripture in Psalm 55:22 “cast your burden upon the Lord and He shall sustain you; he shall never permit the righteous to be moved.” I love this it is filled with action on our part and then shows Gods role and why. That’s the power of having a devoted payer life.

There are several practical things that we can do to help ourselves when anxiety is trying to get a hold. I notice that structure and routine help my mind and therefore my actions. I work in a field where chaos and the darker side of life reign, so my personal life has the opposite, which means creating an organised environment and having lighter times and connecting with positive friendships each day to help me feel a lot calmer.

Over recent weeks I have been running a short distance everyday in the evening to bring routine in the chaos of transition, I find myself making lists not of what to do but what I will do each day. We shouldn’t under estimate the power of eating healthily and at regular intervals. Ditching the junk food and reducing sugar intake can help immensely so our blood sugars don’t bounce around too much helping us to.

Something my grandmother passed onto me was to stop and watch the flowers and enjoy the moment. For me that looks like taking a coffee at a set time, and tea in the afternoon at a set time on my own as much my schedule allows, each day this provides with me a margin of time to rest my mind and be.

When I feel the presence of stress or pressure I notice that I tend to get very whizzy in my thoughts and actions, some may think I am having a highly creative moment but really it’s a stress reaction. Switching off the tv, taking a break from social media and computer devises allows me to gain perspective without extra voices directing my thoughts and emotions; getting down time is really important in the age of connectivity. This is where having times of booked in gym sessions will release all of that and clear my mind completely allowing my mind and body to come back to normal rhythm.

If you remember nothing else, establishing a rhythm for life that works with your personalities, could be the way of finding your freedom from anxiety. Don Egan whom I work with has written a small booklet “Rhythm of Life” which goes into more detail about the how to gain peace on the inside when the outside is difficult.

You can order the Rhythm of Life booklet from RSVP here.

LEVELS OF FREEDOM

May 19, 2015May 19, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ 2 Comments

Freedom pillar Apartheid museum I have noticed that there are levels of freedom from addiction. We can set ourselves free from using the substance or drug of our choice; that is one level. Then there are the layers that have to be peeled back by asking questions such as ‘why did I do that?’ or ‘why am I vulnerable to addictive patterns of behavior in my life?’

I strongly believe that Jesus has the ability to set us free in the blink of an eye. This was my own experience but then I had all the under-the-surface pain and anger to look at. I have read lots of books and articles, and listened to talks about how to deal with the root of addiction, yet nothing seems to help. The pain and anger are still present and they raise their ugly heads from time to time and, without a sunstone to sooth that pain, the feelings are overwhelming at times.

In the end, I did the same thing as I did when I prayed for Jesus to set me free from alcohol. I knelt down and spoke to Jesus about the pain and the anger and I asked Him if He could show me the root of that anguish and bring healing and transformation to my heart, mind, and emotions. Within a day, as I gently allowed time for Him to speak to me, He revealed the original wound so that I could pour some prayer into the area. It is our prayers and the prayers of others that gives Jesus access to the root to make way for the next level of healing.

Healing can be a process that happens as we draw close to the spirit of Jesus. We may get clean of an addiction to a substance or a drug, but then we need inner healing on the hidden darkness in each of us. I believe the Bible when it says that Jesus heals all our diseases (Psalm 103:3). He transforms our darkness, painful past, and original wounds, and He bestows His presence into those areas bringing the abundant life (John10: 10).

When the healing comes, it is often in a twinkling of an eye but we may have been praying for it for many years. Suddenly, inner peace comes and we are able to forgive, we are able to let the pain and the anger fade as God draws the dark places inside us into the light—the light of His glorious truth.

Jesus invites us to go to Him with anything and He will quench our thirst if we draw from Him as a resource—and we will no longer be thirsty (John 7: 38). Let’s get prepared to receive levels of freedom. Come and drink of the spirit of Jesus and we will not get thirsty. Let the savior of the world quench the thirst of our cravings / loneliness / anger/ pain and bring healing and love to our mortal bodies.

Anxious Solutions: Part One

May 8, 2015May 12, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

I thought I would write a few thoughts down about this huge topic. As we walk through life we meet all sorts of people and have all sorts of situations around us. This means we will encounter stress and anxiety so rather than try and avoid people and places I have found it helpful to have a plan to counteract stress before anxiety begins to take hold. Over the years it is Gods presence that has help me to handle anxious moments when they come.

Earlier this week I spent some time chatting about how I have learned to handle anxiety with a woman that I help to mentor. What I have discovered over the years however we try to eliminate encountering stressful situations they will still come. Often out the blue anxiety will creep on us. It is the constant drip that builds into a collapsed person.

A few years back I got so unwell from being exposed to chronic stress that it began to affect my body physically until I had full on adrenal collapse. I had no control over this and it took two years for my body to recover. I was left with the warning from professionals that I had to change my lifestyle. Being in the throws of ministry this has been a challenge. I have to live a calmer life and mostly practise not carrying others problems in my own heart and mind. So I have to work mental and physical boundaries to the max.

Anxiety is the product of fear. So when I have the feelings of dread, nausea or panic begin to come I ask myself what is it that I am afraid of and does the apprehension come from a rational thought or from a perceived thought. So the second question to ask is what is the fear based in reality or not. If it is a real fear coming as a waning then we need to stop do something about it. However if it is not then we must lay the fear down somewhere. The state of stress can be made worse if we hold the fear inside ourselves like its a precious secret that we need to keep but it is actually something that can take hold and seek to effect other areas of life including relationships.

Fear is sneaky and at it’s best at nighttime when it is dark and when we are alone so the third question to ask is who can I share this with so we are not isolated in the situation. It is helpful as another voice will bring a different and maybe the rational voice we need to hear.

The most important thought I have on anxiety is to bring everything to God the author and finisher of our faith. Jesus claimed in the Bible that we should “put all our cares and burdens of him as he cares for us” he recommends that we don’t worry and uses the birds of the air as an analogy pointing out that they are provided for and looked after so why do we worry about what will happen all the time.

When we allow anxiety to come and be a friend life may pass us by, as we are too busy caught up in the worry. Having a relationship with God through prayer will help ease any anxiety we maybe carrying. If we pray daily about the things that concern us each day placing them at the feet of Jesus then He can carry those burdens on our behalf and we can walk in peace even in the midst of very difficult and sometimes traumatic situations. God’s peace can rule our heart. As we pray the sacred peace invades us and anxiety, stress and worry diminish – they loose their grip.

So spend a few moments with God in the quiet and let him bring quiet to your heart and mind each day.

Fire Brand

March 19, 2015March 19, 2015 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

When we first encountered God we had an excitement, a passion, a fire that burned on the inside. I know I did. This fire creates radical change and growth of a person. Immediately I left my old lifestyle and moved into the pursuit of relationship with God above all else. I made personal sacrifices to follow Jesus and His leading in my life. Nothing else mattered. Overtime we can become dulled to the presence and activity of God in our lives; taking Him for granted with maybe no personal cost. The Bible calls this lukewarm in the book of Revelation 3:14-21 “So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”

We read of the Holy Spirit challenging the Church for neglecting their passion for God. Yet despite the rebuke Jesus is standing knocking at the door of our Churches and our hearts wanting to come in. Where we have become lukewarm Jesus wants to come to revive the fire again and bring revival to us personally and that in turn will bring revival for nations. Passionate people live extra ordinary lives for the gospel where sacrificial living becomes the normal when personal revival comes.

To pursue God is not an easy path to walk. It carries the cost of surrender, a lying down of the old to birth the new. It brings a “broken and contrite spirit” Psalm 51:17 a renewed awareness of the need for Gods presence, an awareness of shame, sin, an exposing poor attitudes and behaviour that doesn’t reflect Christ. Living and thinking without Gods presence in our daily lives causes us to weep with remorse when the fire of God comes. We feel undone but all of this draws us to cling to God who loves us deeply and wants to heal our lives and land.

Revivals that reach the lost have happened throughout the centuries. What if we all had a personal revival that would impact our nations? Are we ready for a visitation of God across our lands? Revivals of the past have a thread that flows throughout them, prayer; a compulsion to push deeply into God. Seeking the face of God through prayer brings a release of holiness in a person, healing, forgiveness, restoration, freedom, right living suddenly become a way of life but it is not by our achievement but by a supernatural intervention. Revival comes as faith becomes seen and God is glorified.

As we draw close to God he will draw close to us bringing personal revival. Be on fire with God and not lukewarm. People on fire with God are shakers and movers who bring transformation to broken communities they turn injustice on its upside down and bring heal nations. Fire brands live extra ordinary lives because they have opened the door to God.

2 Chronicles 7:14 “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”

Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place

September 4, 2013January 10, 2016 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

Corrie Ten Boom during her years of ministry wrote and spoke about forgiveness. If you listen to some of her sermons she is all about intimacy with God and forgiveness demonstrating that the two go together. Whilst reading one of her books “He Sets the Captives Free” I noticed she refers to visiting an African prisoner who was struggling to forgive. Her advice was to “forgive people otherwise we won’t be forgiven”, a difficult phrase to say and receive but one that Jesus taught.

Matthew 6:14 “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.”

Maybe the largest challenge we face as we go through our lifespan is to forgive ourselves when we mess up either in thoughts, words or actions. We will mess up most days if we are honest with ourselves but don’t despair as the prognosis for us is good!

Thanks to Jesus we have access to the love of God through the ministry of the Holy Spirit in our lives. If we hold onto sadness over our failings we are heading into self-resentment, bitterness and landing up on the step of self-hatred that can cause all sorts of issues. The Bible requires us to ” love others as we love ourselves” found in Matthew 12:30-31 if we do not consider this truth we will find it impossible to love others as we can only give what we have received. We are often happy to hear Gods kindness towards us but then beat ourselves up every day therefore failing to act out the truth.

Now love is an action and an attitude so we may need to renew our minds regarding self-image, thereby beginning to honor or respect the temple (oneself) where the Spirit of God lives. Loving oneself is a requirement as our bodies, mind and soul are the temple where the Holy Spirit lives. Therefore we should not despise the place where God dwells through the Holy Spirit as we have mercy toward others we must also allow Gods mercy to touch oneself.

To function in extending forgiveness toward self we must first get rid of any illusion in our minds that anyone of us is perfect, news flash there is no such person apart from Jesus who was or is perfect and sinless. So we must stop striving for that false goal and stop trying to fix ourselves, it is the ministry of the Holy Spirit in our lives who transforms us so we need more intimacy with God through prayer and stillness not false unachievable goals in our lives.

The prayer that is below is the prayer that Corrie Ten Boom prayed with the African man that you may want to say and reflect on towards yourself.

” Thank you Jesus, that you have brought into my heart Gods love through the Holy Spirit. Thank you, Father, that your love in me is stronger than my hatred.'”

Corrie Ten Boom

By praying and reflecting on those words myself I realised I have the ability and desire to forgive others and myself as its Gods work in my heart and His love is a gift given to me by God Himself. Therefore I must forgive myself as I forgive others, that’s mercy in action.

STOP IT!

September 12, 2012February 11, 2016 ~ alisonfenning ~ Leave a comment

Just wondering today who you maybe trying to please? Are you really living the life you have designed or are you living by the standards and expectations of others. Living from the foundation of other people’s expectations can prevent you ever living the dream you may hold in your heart.

From my perspective of being in the ministry people are always trying to put their own agendas and expectations on me and when I can’t live up to them this leads to disappointment on their part and a sense of failure on mine. So the best option is not to entertain others expectations but live by vision that given by God.

There are three boundaries that we will need to implement if we are to stop living through others expectations.

1. Gain the vision of God for your life. Position yourself with the mindset that God has a plan for me and I need to find out what that is. Listening prayer will is a means of God communicating and tuning into your hearts true longings. He will get the vision to you that is His responsibility. Positioning comes through prayer.

James 4:10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

1Chronicles 7:14 If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

2. Stop allowing everyone to put his or her agenda/ expectation on you.Jesus recommends that we “Come unto me, all of you who labor and are forced to bear burdens, and I shall give you rest” Matthew11: 28. He also claimed that he would place on us His burden that is light and easy. So we can identify the difference between living through Gods vision and others expectations.

3. Get some self-respect, if we can’t respect ourselves no one else will. We must be really good at saying NO more often, as we do so we will learn the valuable lesson that people will still like us. Jesus has asked us to “love others as we love ourselves” Matthew22: 29. We will only be able to respect and love others when we learn to appreciate ourselves more.

So God is calling us to STOP living everyone else’s life and discern your own calling then walk it out. Have the courage to follow Gods plan and you will notice a lighter step in your walk. Make some changes in your mind and follow your God given dream.